speaker 1: 
speaker 2: this call may be recorded hello hey how you doing ma'am hanging in there okay your your mom is kind of in hyperdrive close she's contacting my mom and she's calling and texting me repeatedly, and she wants to McDonald's phone number so that she can check in on you that way yeah so anyways I was actually just on the phone with Janie and I think that Jamie stinks that if you had told her that you were going to talk to her once a week and you just talked to her on Sunday then you really should have responded to her very first text on Monday by saying I'll talk to you again on Saturday okay because the way the way you set it up you you actually make it look like any time any day of the week that she tries to call and can't get through to you you must be killing yourself like you've done that not not hurt you set it up to look that way by the way that you've responded and not responded and responded and not responded but then he's like more than anything it's just disappointing that would make that commitment to set that boundary with your mom and said don't follow through with what you said you do do you feel like you don't know how to do that okay do you need help with something today is that something that your mom can help with okay do you feel like you need to be talking to your mom okay are you were you disappointed let's see what see a not offering to help you I'm CA said that he talked to you this morning about that I didn't but I didn't know what his answer to do was he says he'll talk to them but they won't help okay and was that disappointing or were you pleased with that okay what I need to be in the middle of it I said I think you're right you don't need to be in the middle of the okay I mean the part he's right about is that you've done this song and dance of I need you I need you I need you to interact with my parents. They said to a professionals that it could be penalized for a truth and opening billing to do it and that's the compelling but it's not true that's interesting what you need to look at is the fact that you need to understand that I did interact with each of your therapists and you need to think about how one in silence wage no please stop please stop on your end what did you do with the information that was provided did you pay off so if something's wrong with me could you please please stop interrupting yeah you were if I know but when CA says it's not going to do any good it's a matter of are you ready to take ownership of the behavior of that have been harmful all right if you're going to tell you when people give the information to your
speaker 1: therapists you
speaker 2: minimize and make excuses and then you take the the reactions that people had and you took the reactions that people had and you don't make it clear that those reactions the code after you aggressive behavior that information that's based on that page then please stop please stop Dustin we try we tried but it is not used I've been trying for months I've been trying but it's not going to do any good if you don't take the information and listen and learn from it if your if your goal to take whatever negative information is given to a therapist and make sure that you explain your side of it to the therapist the therapist doesn't blame you for it or the therapist thinks that you were only asking you. to other people's aggression it's not going to be helpful you you have to be willing to own your own behaviors I've ever not been willing to own my own that's not true that's not true is it true I have a 2010 recording a few aggressive against need to explain why it was logical choice to expose myself to my mother and that you owned that piano since you were six years old that is not you trying to own your own behaviors but anyways I think John exposed myself to your mother but I still have that recorder I still have it if you can go away just because you're saying something different right now so you can't make claims like I've never got it you can't make claims like I I never got Oakland behaviors you've spent hours and hours and hours and hours and hours not owning your behaviors and when you do that to other people it has a negative effect on me hey buddy right now and I think that Jamie thinks that
speaker 1: you
speaker 2: know I mean you can look at your phone records and you can see what the last time you talked to your mom was right I don't know I get a lot of phone calls probably gone then you know you talked to on Mother's Day right you know so if you talk to you on Mother's Day for mother's day that was Sunday and if you feel like you made it clear to your mom that you're talking to her once a week you can say hey Mom still planning on speaking to you once a week my last call was Sunday so you'll hear from me by Sunday
speaker 1: you
speaker 2: think it's clear to her that that's the boundary right now
speaker 1: I mean a letter trample all over it
speaker 2: okay so it's not fair the only way it would be clear to her as if you enforce it can I ask the blocker I guess if the boundaries not clear the boundaries that clear you've got you've done everything here and she's already I know but you're saying by allowing her to travel all over it with you made it clear that it wasn't a real boundary and so it was logical somewhere to think that you were saved yesterday you did that set a boundary you just it was logical for her to think that you were not paid yesterday that's a logical for her to be worried about your safety based on your behavior because you did that ever said about injury ever you verbalized to her that you wanted to talk to her once a week but that's a setting a boundary can't do better than that and say that you waited that to her from the from the day that you verbalized that to her if you had only talked to them once a week then you would have actually been setting a boundary and she wouldn't have reason to be worried about you right now you've done everything in your power to make her have a reasonable expectation that she should have access to your otherwise you are not safe so are you should probably texter and remind her that you planning to talk to her once a week and they talked to her on Sunday can you talk to on Sunday and then if you want to pick up the phone and call it on Saturday cuz you got more time available on Saturdays and Sundays that's fine and when you talk to her on Saturday I'll be sure to have to be this
speaker 1: Saturday okay yes
speaker 2: yes I understand it's not right for my mother to have to deal with her saying that you bought a new but that's a result of your behavior but it's if that's a result of your behavior my mother is being harassed as a result of your life easier with your mom it's not appropriate for you to make your mom until you're at risk and then randomly with no warning out of nowhere inconsistent with all of your past behaviors decide that you're not going to return your calls and texts I said my mother my mother is now I know but but I'm saying you need to connect the dots to your own behavior off my mother has been harassing result of your decisions and your behavior it was not reasonable for you to spend time on the phone with your mother making your mother think that you're at home when your mom asks you for commitments to caller if you're down for you to say that's not going to do any good and further make your mom worried about you and further make your mom saying that she needs to be responsible for your emotional well-being and then randomly was no warning no context no explanation out of nowhere before the first time besides your job to stop responding to her calls and texts that was not logical or reasonable for you to do that and the result of that is my mother being harassed he told me last night I know but are you are you the one who has been consistent in enforcing what you said about once a week because I'm the day that you first told her once a week is she texted you in the middle of that week and didn't get a response but then you talked to her on Saturday then that would have been you setting a boundary and then the next week if she called off on a weekday and you didn't respond but then you called her on Saturday by now she would be pretty well trained to know that you're going to call her on Saturdays and she couldn't reach you on a Monday she was worried but you haven't behaved in a way that is made that reasonable thing for her to think that you're just calling around Saturday at this point you should tell her that you talked to her on Sunday and you plan to talk to her by next Sunday okay does that make sense
speaker 1: okay
speaker 2: bye okay bye