speaker 1: 
speaker 2: this call may be recorded hey so I am just going to like video conference for my I think that's tomorrow you broke up but I'm not going to drive to Jacksonville for my counseling session I'm just going to video chat okay was that something you were wanting to join what time is it at 11:30 11:30 tonight app for my phone yeah you were wanting to do when you thought it was in person giving it briefly for you you don't want to I want to cuz you want me to I think my my concern is that that's not going to be a good use of my time and a good use of our money if you're not dead doing it for the right reasons well, the reason what do you hope to get out of it I don't know let's see wait did you have in mind I it's confused because you're the one who's been telling me for over a month maybe 3 months that we need a couple of counseling yeah you trying to put the whole thing around on me like you're doing it for me cuz creepy I still think we need couple counseling and I don't think that we can get it from them but the question is what you're going to do the question is what you're wanting to get out of it and that was for you it's it's for you it's for you no actually be for you you asked me to go and I will have this whole thing around on me like this this is getting old if you don't want me to go then I'm not going to go and just it I'm talking about you wanting counseling with me that's what I'm talking about independent of who delivers it I'm talking about you wanting counseling I'm assuming that you a couple accounts I'm not talking about that right now I'm talking about you insisting and insisting and insisting and insisting that we need some kind of marital therapy what are you hoping to get out of it I think that we do have trouble communicating okay so what what changes are you thinking you'd like to have happened I don't know sounds like it's not going to be a good use of time then cuz my dog therapy and counseling Thursday we you just through the one who just said that we have a recording of it. Then I didn't say that I could do the time I'm doing it because I want you to do it and you don't think that it probably about canceling I know I know so I'm saying if what you're hoping to get out of counseling in general you have no idea but you think that we have communication problems you're not going to get somebody you don't I know if you if you knew like okay what I want is to stop blame-shifting or what I want in life is to stop getting defensive what I'm criticized or what I want is to be like if you have something really specific and then that would be effective but if you're acting like you're expecting a counselor follow what you're saying cuz you keep completing the issue of math or objective counselor a month I asked what you wanted out of counseling in general because that would determine whether going to that or would be useful and if you wanted to go into couples counseling without having any specific things that you want to work on any specific things that you want to own then that means that going to the counselor to explain the situation to the counselor and you're looking for the counselor to give you some kind of a prescription of what it is you need to do or what you need to work on Thursday so if you don't trust that that's not going to I'm just going to stop talking if you don't trust Matt it's not going to do any good to go to him and put him in the role of a referee or a judge or a Doctor Who's going to give you you know here's how what need to change that that's a waste of time if you are going to him telling him like that you already know what it is that you want to do then that would be useful even without you buying in him because he could still help you get to where you tell you know what you tell them you want to accomplish okay I don't really appreciate like being treated the way I'm being treated on this phone call I'm sorry thank you so I just want to clarify that you independently don't want to go to my session tomorrow okay is that correct I guess so no is it correct I don't know honey I was willing to go I'm not you know she can't talk to me in a way that leaves the door open for you to point a finger at them no matter what I can't have next week, round and you say you made me go to that knowing that he was going to this or that I can't I can't risk that so you don't need to go back in the next week risking you saying you wouldn't even include me in your counseling sessions I offered to go and you said you didn't want me I told you I'd do it you're the one who didn't want me to go like I can't do that you cannot keep treating me this way
speaker 1: if
speaker 2: you want to go you have to own that you want to go if you don't want to go you have to own that you don't want to go and you need the own phone please don't talk to me that way I thought you wanted me to say that I don't want to go I know but she hear your tone like I asked you five or six different times and all you have to say was I don't think so or no or or that's right I I I don't want to and instead you like spin it into this big thing and when I explained to you why it's really important job you start holding it you say okay I don't want to go I'm not going to go it's I'm sorry I don't deserve this sorry I'm just trying to do what I thought you wanted that that's the problem okay it's blame shifting that's the you finding fresh ways every day to blame me for stuff that is not my fault you told me you were going to think about what I said yesterday yes and the taxes did not realize I was on a timeline sorry would you like me to do that instead of taxes tonight I'm not going to allow you to put me in that position all right did you want to do anything for your birthday with me
speaker 1: you know
speaker 2: what I want I don't you wrote it in The Notebook okay
speaker 1: and that's what I'll do
speaker 2: did you end up talking to Kevin no no is is finished taxes writing on your notebook yes is think about what we talked about on Sunday and you don't book all right you should have that bye