speaker 1: 
speaker 2: this call may be recorded Hey Mami oh
speaker 1: hey are you working in the basement okay do you think that I should send people over to look at it while you're there to avoid people having to do meetings or do you think that we should finish all the work and clean it first schedule
speaker 2: stuff I would probably clean it first okay have you been in there yet yeah obviously doesn't look too bad except that couch look I mean it's not unusable cuz it is nice but it looks
speaker 1: dirty do you need me to help you carry the
speaker 2: couch yeah we're just going to put it by the road I need somebody to okay
speaker 1: well maybe I should send people by there while you're
speaker 2: working okay sure saves a lot of
speaker 1: time you know what I mean neither one of us have to go meet anybody how long do you think you'll be
speaker 2: there I don't know but a while
speaker 1: okay when's your mom arriving
speaker 2: just about to call her when you called
speaker 1: me do you think maybe we should have an asset itinerary at the exact time that we're just going to plan to go to the beach or to lunch or to the McDonald's so that there's no up at the air you know what I mean I
speaker 2: don't know to me that's that seems stilted in a way that yeah I just would hate
speaker 1: for I would hate for anything your mom suggest doing wage and we end up not doing to be taken as us trying
speaker 2: to yeah but that way they know I think doing it that way more
speaker 1: apparent it's way more normal to have like plans for when you're entertaining out-of-town guests like hey we were thinking it'd be fun to go to the beach for a couple of hours weather looks really nice what's that around 9:30 like if you know what I mean and for some reason she's just like oh I I didn't bring the right clothing I'd rather spend time in a day then we can be flexible to do a back-up plan like good hosts I'm just thinking I'm just thinking if it's it seems like your mom never wants to just stay home all day she always thinks that we have to go somewhere else if she says she wants to go to HomeGoods then there's going to be hurt
speaker 2: feelings that does make me wonder if we shouldn't take advantage of the fact that she's here to like stuff that costs money to the
speaker 1: kids so okay I don't know how she would feel about us actually taking advantage of her okay do you I'm only sensitive because we actually needed actual shoes for our children actual their feed and actual books for our children's actual education and it got turned against
speaker 2: me I hear you
speaker 1: so now it's she won't even talk to me on the phone but as soon as she can get me to spend $200 she'll do it like I don't want to put myself in that position
speaker 2: back seat under the impression that you want to talk to her on the phone by the way that's what I said
speaker 1: okay I'm saying that's what would happen if all of a sudden we had plans and then got home pay for it that's going to be what she thinks about me is that I'm refusing to talk to her but I'll take advantage of her by getting money from her like I only want to be around here if I'm getting their money out of money I got you she's not you know I don't know she's happy to spend money when it suits her but she can use that against me she will I
speaker 2: might try and get her to get me vape juice while she's here if I really can't buy
speaker 1: any I don't want you to do that don't do it I know you I know but you need to know who were actual support team is and you need to know who actually loves you and you need to know who actually has your physical and mental and emotional best interests at heart and it's nice person who'd be willing to buy you vape juice you have no idea your children need you and someday your grandchildren are going to need you and you got no business jeopardizing that
speaker 2: doesn't jeopardize that yeah it does suck yeah it does no it doesn't yes it does yes it does it doesn't
speaker 1: yes it does
speaker 2: I might need to use some of my budget money to do it and
speaker 1: then you're going to go without eating you will not eat food and you might end up on the side of the road without believe that I am not going to come and supply for you if you're not able to make those kinds of decisions well
speaker 2: then I'm not going to be able to
speaker 1: work then it's okay I I don't know what to tell you except that it's going to be over between us like really I mean I get that it's up to you if you want to cold turkey and I get that it's up to you if you get a paper off and I guess that is up to you if you want to use the patch and I get that you know takes time and I get that it's hard and then happy to support you by buying you some flower seeds and two and go off and you know like that kind of thing but that's not what we're talking about here you made this decision to start this without taking your family into
speaker 2: account so
speaker 1: you knew that I wasn't signing up for this one I married you and you knew that it was a deal-breaker for me before I even met you I decided I wasn't going to go down this road with any man ever it's not okay I
speaker 2: don't know what to tell you it's not realistic to just be like you're done but
speaker 1: I know that's what I said I get the car you but that's not what you're talking about doing here you're talking about getting your mom who
speaker 2: actually $100 a month your mother all of my extensive not even enough
speaker 1: to do that dusting you did that you did that you've been making that voice for years you did that you chose 30% interest rates you did that I'm not the one who got you on this budget you got yourself on this budget all by yourself and if your mom would do that to you she doesn't care about your well-being she's out for your soul that's not true it's absolutely true I don't know not that's not a loving God that's not a loving thing to do for somebody that's a way that you own them cuz you know you know how you know you know you know how tight a grip that stuff has on you and the person who can supply that owns you they don't if you need it if you need it if you can't do without it if you choose it over your family it owns you and if you can't
speaker 2: Supply all right I'm going to call him
speaker 1: on you're going to do it aren't you what you're going to tell her that I told you you can't Vape it's in your heart to do that to me right now what do you mean it's not
speaker 2: I'm going to call her and ask her when she's coming
speaker 1: here in to bring a juice
speaker 2: I don't know about that I wasn't planning on asking her that right now
speaker 1: well are you calling to set boundaries like see I told you to I
speaker 2: can't remember any actual boundaries I need to set with with you
speaker 1: well it sounded like you had decided that you don't want to talk to her about bringing gifts until she's already here
speaker 2: right
speaker 1: even though you know that under the rules you've given her she could bring 12 because that would count for this calendar here but you'll see on waiting till she's driven all the way from Maryland in fact her car carefully to tell her that you're changing the rules on the spot right is that correct okay if that's what you decided
speaker 2: so up here with gas when I'm I don't have a house because I can take I want her to be sure
speaker 1: but you're saying that she doesn't know that she'll be spending time with me this weekend right and technically the allotment of 12 would still fall under what they should be entitled to bring back to Stanley Drive so I just feel like that scenario might throw it all on to me because you've got a good excuse you don't have a house with my excuse I'm being petty and trying to keep them away from their grandmother you know what I mean
speaker 2: I'll be the one to tell
speaker 1: her I know but it just will sound a lot like you're delivering a boundary that I told you that you had to deliver if she's not you know no
speaker 2: matter when I tell her that's going to be
speaker 1: her. No I think I was trying to give you hints on how you could own it as best you can
speaker 2: do you think all this week I need to call her and tell her she's already
speaker 1: driving oh okay if she's already driving then probably could just text text then and say what's your ETA
speaker 2: off no she asked me to call her
speaker 1: you said she does know that I'm going to spend time with them this weekend or she doesn't seem but she knows you're at the McDonald House yeah and does she know about Benson's birthday party all right I guess I'll call Brianna and see if she's a you know comfortable with your mom coming that's a good idea okay so Monday so you're just calling to ask your mom when she's coming and not tell her anything at all
speaker 2: now I would I plan doesn't seem like to talk about gift right now and she's very on the bay
speaker 1: yeah yeah yeah I'm sorry I didn't realize that she was already on the way so yeah I definitely don't okay
speaker 2: at the most likely thing is having two guests and that way she doesn't have to be that we're doing a gifting right now
speaker 1: right she's she should be more focused on giving yourself back to you he's getting the apartment stuff back from you yeah sounds good all right
speaker 2: when I am done at the apartment do you want me to come back over there for a little bit or
speaker 1: just go back know coming over here after phone number by the woman who found his voice sounds like she's a little bit older I guess her name her name is Mary Janis
speaker 2: okay
speaker 1: all right bye I love you know how long do you think you'll be there
speaker 2: I'm guessing a couple of hours okay